Haiden

I hold you close and feel your tiny lungs, breathing,

And I find myself appreciating life for what it is rather than

What it contains.

Mine, full and overflowing, bursting at the seams,

Is suddenly now full of empty space, so that the light can come in.

Your laughter, like music, reverberates around my mind.

Your tiny hand guides me here and there,

And suddenly there is nothing more important than to be here with you now.

I am unbound by definitions, a whole person reflected in your shining face:

“Itsy—” and you want to play with me.

The world becomes this very light and beautiful place when I’m with you.

Everything is in slow motion.

You guide me step by step,

Pointing out the most interesting and incredible parts of the world,

A pine cone and papa’s big car.

They truly are more amazing than I had given them credit for.

Your scheming eyes and well-placed kisses make me find playfulness in everyday moments.

You are a gigantic, bursting ball of light, completely shattering the conventions of the universe by your beauty.

You are like nothing I’ve ever seen.

My lungs ache, wanting to take in enough air to stay forever placed in this moment,

Where you are laughing, and playing, and you love me.

My hands could break with their desperation to grab you and hold you back from all of this terrible world.

You are just too beautiful to understand, they’ll never know what to do with you.

Your blue eyes are the most dazzling things I have ever seen, so chocked full of wonder and surprise and mischief.

Your tiny hands are my shelter.

Your unquestioning love is my hope beyond hope, my sole and single proof of goodness.

Your life is what holds me above water, what assures me of truth and frightens me about lies.

You are the very definition of beauty, my love,

What all our hopes are riding on.

I will love you until the day I die, I will give my very breath if it’s what you need, I will die for you.

And I will be, here, in this picturesque life with you, in slow motion and bathed in the most glorious light.

We can live in a painting,

We can stay in this beauty as long as I’m with you.

I will never let you go.

I love you, Bubba.

-"Itsy"
Sarah Sanders, '11